Just a quick note to say I hope you have or had a good new year celebration!

Modern art

I hope a fine Christmas was had by all. I have had to rethink my feelings on modern art over the holidays. It's as much a label thing as anything else. In one of my art books there is a dry stone wall sculpture that wends it's way through the forest. I can appreciate it as an ex countryside ranger and as an artist. It is very impressive. The art I have a problem with is like that below:

I'm not sure what it's meant to be or what it's label is (I'd call it simplistic nothingness. But maybe I'm missing something and I am guilty of making little planets

Energy

Hi all, hope you had a good Christmas. Sometimes it's difficult to work up the energy to do something isn it? It's especially true  after the holidays. Best thing to do is to get dressed up and get out into the wilds. You might have snow where you are and will take little encouragement to get out in it. Go on, get out there and act like a kid! The weather hear is dry and bright with a crisp coldness: wonderful weather for a walkabout. You've got the advantage of there being no leaves on the trees, so do keep an eye upward for interesting birds. You never know what you mjght see at this time of year.

What are you all doing for New Year's Eve? I'll be going out for a  drink or two then back to the farm and down to my favourite place in the woods,  by the river with a little fire and a few drinks, withe my radio tuned to tell me the time. A bit strange perhaps, but I've never been accused of being normal! Why not post what you have planned!

Sometimes you forget!

I'm a keen, if unskilled artist and get all the art magazines and loads of books hoping the knowledge will float from the page into my addled brain. 

I was merrily reading artist magazine and came to the letters page. One letter caught my attention and I thought the bloke was in a very similar position and of similar beliefs. I looked at the name of the correspondent to send in a response and there it was; my name in black and white!

Depressio

I suffer from depression, which is largely controlled by tablets. Having a hip replacement and fluid on my knees doesn't help and no I'm not very old I got a bone disease called vascular necrosis. I have generally been feeling relatively happy of late and have enjoyed my involvement with art. However I have suffered from odd stretches of melancholy.I think I may have found the cause-it's when I have painter's block and cannot think of anything to paint. This was not helped by a disastrous oil painting:I was too impatient to let the colours turn dry to the touch before painting the next layer. My lesson learned I now have an oil and acrylic on the go at the same time and for some reason it has taken this long to realise that the internet provides a rich source of material…my mood has improved greatly.

Foxes

I was just pottering today as I've twisted my knee. It made me think how fit I was when I was  a ranger, but I was not a magician as some people thought. I was sat in my office when a man phoned and told me he had a family of foxes in his garden. I , being naive thought he was telling me as a point of interest. I couldn't believe it when he asked me if I could move them. Only just keeping a straight face I pointed out that this would not be possible. I called someone I know in the wildlife trust and his response was much the same as mine-think himself lucky. There is a wild animal repellant available in garden centres and I said he could fence his garden he told me the property was much too large. It made me wonder how such a nitwit could afford a large house?

I Can't Draw

I can't draw. That's what I used to tell people if they asked. Any artistic expression was through the medium of words; prose rather than poetry. Happily writing for magazines I just accepted that I would never be able to draw or paint.

Then a friend on Facebook put me in her Art Group and we had discussions on various art and I became interested in optical illusions like those of Escher and Robert Gonsalves. This naturally went on to become a near obsession with visual art. I wished and wished I could draw, then I read in one of my art books that we are all artists from being young but some continue and others don't. In addition, while there is definitely a natural talent within some art is like most subjects, the body and mind can be trained and practiced and you will be surprised how quickly you improve. Now I do  watercolour, gouache, acrylic, pastel, pencil and I have an oil set that I am preparing myself for as I find it a little intimidating. If you really want to draw have a go and practice. Don't worry how it appears it will improve and if you're sitting, waiting for something or have a long train journey it's wonderful to be able to flip open your drawing pad and start doodling!

Solitude or Reflection

Taking this photo of John Martin's resulted in an interesting effect of the gallery behind and no reflection of the photo taker (my dad) above the legs... Anyone figure out what the other paintings are?

Strange!

Agalmatophilia  

            This is a fairly rare, but unfortunate affliction, which can lead to not only (most certainly) unrequited sexual desire, but total destruction of your reputation, or the creation of a new reputation, depending on how you look at it.

            Agalma is from the Greek for statue and philia, of course meaning love. The sufferer of this condition, proclivity, perversion, call it what you will is basically turned on by inanimate objects. I don’t mean washing machines (we all know about their popularity), or tables or chairs. Nor do I mean inanimate images of a sexual nature. I refer, more specifically to human shaped things: statues, dolls mannequins, scarecrows. It is also known as Pygmalionism; named for the play by Ovid, in which the protagonist falls in love with a beautiful statue.

            Because of this the practise it has been argued that agalmatophilia represents a quest for purity and perfection, so raising it above the other erotic pleasures. The same cannot be said about the more common forms, of which there are three. Firstly there is the (mostly female) practice of using a doll or statue in pleasuring herself or abusing herself, depending how you look at it. I hear the cries of ‘What about inflatable ladies?’ I shall come to that in a moment. The subject with which we are currently concerned involves the use of a model of an adored person, somebody unattainable in the flesh, or it may be the nearest long hard object to hand used in a very personal way.

            The second version, and one that is well known, and if the market standing and production is anything to go by, is very popular, is that (mostly male) activity of using a doll to replace a real woman. One can, of course purchase items designed specifically for the task. But it has not always been so. Particularly in rural areas the doll would be made of straw or something soft, dressed in women’s clothing and include a soft, penetrable object, in many cases an eviscerated chicken. There is a story from Bresse in France where a young lady had to be comforted because of her husband’s night-time forays. Apparently he would head off into the fields with a fresh chicken to visit the local scarecrows.

            In the third instance the object is not a statue or a doll, but a person who remains perfectly still. In most cases it is the male that is active and the female passive, although the roles may be reversed. Whatever, the basis of the situation is that one partner feigns helplessness against the advances of their partner. It is common for the passive partner to be painted white to resemble ivory or marble. A good example is provided by a lady of the nobility, who shall remain nameless. She arranges the more athletic of her footmen into a gathering of immobile human statues, supporting fruits and pastries for her guests. Her claim that this is merely an extension of her artistic surroundings and nature is quite seriously disproved as she thrashes those footmen that have moved, and indulges here considerable carnal desire on those who have put on a good show. It really does take the old joke about the shop dummy and the electric drill to a new level.

Jump about

I'm not sure if it's just me but it seems that when you get an interest in art you jump about all over the place as to what media to use? I've ended up with hard and soft pastels, watercolours and oils along with gouache and I bave markers to do graffiti style. Along with this I've bought books on a kinds of how to draw books. Maybe it's part of the learning process and I'll settle or maybe I'll go completely crazy and mix them all together in one painting !!

Eccentric

Here's a story about what the English would refer to as eccentric:

Jack “Mad Jack” Fuller

            Jack Fuller, later to become “Mad Jack”, was born on 20^th February 1757, in North Stoneham in Hampshire. He was christened in the village of Waldron in Sussex. At the age of 10 he began his education at Eton. On 7^th May 1777 Fuller’s uncle; Rose Fuller MP died, leaving Jack his Sussex Estates and Jamaican plantations. So he took possession of the Rose Hill estate (now Brightling Park), in Sussex.

            In 1801 “Mad Jack”, or “Honest Jack” as he preferred to be called, was MP for Rose Hill (now Brightling). His political behaviour was fiery to say the least. Several times he reduced Parliament to chaos and had to be forcibly removed. One such incident was when he referred to the Speaker as “the insignificant little fellow in the wig”. Fuller’s removal from the premises cannot have been an easy task; he was a large man (22 stone) and was nicknamed ‘Hippo’.

            For all the chaos he caused, he was by most accounts a pleasant man; he had a good sense of humour and no pretentions. On the offer of a peerage he is reported to have said “...I was born Jack Fuller, and Jack Fuller I will die”.

            He loved Rose Hill and commissioned Turner to paint five pictures of the area. During the time he was MP (1801-1812) unemployment was high and Jack had walls built on his estate that he didn’t really need, just to provide work for the local people.

            However, he is best remembered for his love of follies. He built a domed rotunda and a ‘hermit’s’ tower on his estate. Perhaps his most well-know construction was the “Brightling Needle, a 65 foot high obelisk, which is still a landmark in Sussex today. The Sugar Loaf Folly at Dallington was built as a result of a bet Fuller made with his neighbour. Fuller wagered that he could see the conical spire of Dallington church from his window at Rose Hill. When he returned home he found this not to be the case. In keeping with his jolly sense of humour he built a 40 foot replica on a nearby hill, to give the illusion of a half viewed church.

            His masterpiece though was the pyramidal mausoleum he had built for himself, in Brightling church yard. It was designed after the fashion of Sir Robert Smirke, the architect of the British Museum. The reason that he declined conventional burying is logical, if a little eccentric. He believed that he would be eaten by his ‘relatives’ ‘...the worms’. His argument was that the worms would eat him, the ducks would eat the worms and his relatives would eat the ducks.

            It was said that Jack could be found in an armchair, surrounded by broken glass, holding a bottle of claret. He did this in case the devil came for him, so that he would at least cut his feet.

            Jack Fuller then was by all accounts a pleasant and entertaining character and perhaps his small eccentricities are endearing rather than ridiculous?

Magazines

Hello again. Well I got all excited because the editor of a writing magazine liked an idea and offered me £120 for the idea, and I was to look after the monthly column. Quite how it went from this to not being interested in the idea or the column I just don't know. Anyway birdwatching mag is looking to take a piece from me on the supernatural beliefs about the kingfisher. Christmas is, as always sneaking up on me and my dad is impossible to by for usually. He likes the Shadows (band) and I won a horrendously close battle on ebay to buy him a signed, first edition copy of their book. I literally went for my final bid within the last second. This year he wants propellers, and bits for his model aeroplane. But he's mad about cats so I'm going to get a mug with the picture below printed on it: You can also put a short 4 line message on it. I have some basic ideas, but if someone could come up with something witty and send it in, I'd be grateful.

The painting above is quite a famous production by Ralph Hedley, the less prolific painter than his maritime obsessed (but superb) painter.

Some of his paintings are more dramatic than this, but there's something comforting about this - the woman waiting for the return from a beautifully coloured and level sea.

Correction

Don't paint oil paint directly on to water colour as it causes a puddle effect? You can get primer to put on heavy paper so you can apply oils. Sorry about the confusion.

Oil

When I started painting I promised never to do oils. They're too difficult, too smelly, too messy an they take too long to dry. They'll be touch dry in a few days, but it takes about 70 years to officially dry because it doesn't dry by evaporation but by a form of curing.

I'm sure you know where I'm going. I decided to give it a try. I got some primer to coat the psper as apparently you can use paper!! I painted a watercolour background and decided to see if I could use that as primer to put  a swan on the water. Here's my attempt

I know it's not a masterpiece, but I will say it was fun-completely different to any other sort of paint. So if you've not tried it give it a shot, but you will need paint thinners to control paint viscosity and clean your brushes. But experiment and enjoy!

Drawing

For years I wished I could draw and had and still have respect for those who can.I read in one of my art books that the artist believed everyone could draw from when they were little - they just stopped doing it. Also you could learn to draw better. I thought I'd give it a go with pastels and pencils and a how to book. My first efforts were atrocious but after a week I can draw basic things and understand perspective and shading. I've ordered some oils that I hope are coming today. In the meantime I have worked with gouache, water colour and acrylic. It's a great hobby and I'd recommend having a go. Just don't be too hard on yourself and relax and enjoy!

Who?

Just a quick post. What is Richard Hammond doing with a bow and arrow in this painting??? 

Modern Art

Well, I have to take back most of what I thought of as modern art. I paid a visit to the Biscuit factory in Newcastle and was quite amazed. I am, at heart a traditionalist and have always poo pooed modern art as childish rubbish that could be produced by a ten year old with a paint pot.

I was absolutely blown away. It wasn't right at all - the pictures looked like things and were pretty colours. Some of the paintings were more real than the real thing! There was one artist I was particularly taken by; Susan Lincoln. Her work is original, colourful, well produced and if you take the time to look, amusing.

I always thought of modern art as spatters or blocks of colour on canvas that was supposed to represent the inner feelings of the artist, but this was good.

Don't get me wrong, I still prefer high art, especially the woman with the pot of basil

 

Other favourites include the work of John Martin, such as the Deastruction of Sodom and Gomorrah and The Astronomer (which always makes me think of Iron Maiden for some reason!)

 

Brilliant idea!

The kids in this painting had a brilliant idea. They weren't happy with the holiday arrangements so they barred out the teacher and went on strike. I bet they

had a little union and Union leader. My best similar trick was to wait for the teacher to go out for something then the whole class hid in the walk in cupboard. His face was a real picture: pardon the pun! 

Painting

I like to paint, it's relaxing in a way. What I tend to do is get to a critical point in the work and scan it. This way, if I make a balls of it I can go back and do it again with knowledge gained. The problem comes when the pc misbehaves, like it is today..It can't see the scanner and I've tried just about everything. 'Just copy it I hear you say.' Not a bad idea, but sometimes I like to cheat (sorry, use a different medium) and add a difficult bit using the art software on the computer myself.

I have battled with myself whether this is truly cheating and have convinced myself that it isn't. New materials that were more easy to use or gave better results have gained popularity throughout history and the computer is a modern extension of that, because you still need certain  skills to get it to work.

Beginning to think I'm going to be on with this all day, but we shall see.

Jerome - 3 Men in a Boat

Time for some literary art I'm thinking. If you've neve read 3 Men in a Boat by Jerome K Jerome you have missed some witty dialogue, a gloriously escapist story and considering it was written in 1883, some words of wisdom

It is a most extraordinary thing, but I never read a patent medicine advertisement without being impelled to the conclusion that I am suffering from the particular disease therein dealt with in its most virulent form.

• Ch. 1

• Let your boat of life be light, packed with only what you need - a homely home and simple pleasures, one or two friends, worth the name, someone to love and someone to love you, a cat, a dog, and a pipe or two, enough to eat and enough to wear, and a little more than enough to drink; for thirst is a dangerous thing.
  • Ch. 3

• It is very strange, this domination of our intellect by our digestive organs. We cannot work, we cannot think, unless our stomach wills so. It dictates to us our emotions, our passions.
  • Ch. 10

• It always does seem to me that I am doing more work than I should do. It is not that I object to the work, mind you; I like work: it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours. I love to keep it by me: the idea of getting rid of it nearly breaks my heart

Modern Art

As I've mentioned a few times modern art is not my cup of tea. I prefer the spectacular creations of the past that suck you in.

But and it's a big but there is still art that has that effect on both children and adults. The video game has come a long way

This shot from Skyrim is typical of modern games. While we worry (rightfully) that our children are not getting out enough, in the bad weather is it not better that they appreciate art and socialise with others while exercising problem solving skills?

Planting cat

A cat on the farm (Pepe) used to leap into the bird table and it had a roof on it

Lying there for hours (sometimes through the night) he would wait. I don't know to this day whether or not he was successful. There was an oddity that summer; sunflowers sprung up all over the farm. It took us some time to realize that Pepe was picking the bird seed up on his fur and it was being scattered all around when he was on his forays. So a little tip by bags of seeds from pet shops instead of the more expensive garden centres 

Happy planting next year

Heat

God I love my new heater. We had a shop with an electric fire, but the shop went bust and I had the heater straight away.

We live on a farm, out in the sticks and the only central heating comes from the downstairs coal fire. It's a bit of a waste when I'm by myself in the bedroom. So I got the heater and I love it. Switch on using remote control from bed and get up in the warmth! I'm sure a lot of you are used to central heating but just imagine there wasn't any-you wouldn't want to get up!? 

Another tattoo

Some say I'm mad while others think I'm addicted to pain. I got the kestrel tattoo because while the editor didn't take that one it inspired him to take my next.

All this time and I wished for my own column. It's finally happening, in a writing mag..so another kestrel;

Martyr

There are arguments, though most now agree, that both the bard by Bengamin Gray (closeup) and the bard of John Martin (mountains) are pictured about to martyr themselves. I'm no expert and if the experts say that then I can't really argue. The only thing is their stances are  very solid and they don't look like they are going to jump?

Letter to the editor

Hello all. My apologies for the delay in entries, my legd have been really painful. I wrote a letter to the editor of the Artist magazine to make a few points and ask one or two things. I thought I'd share it with you:

The Artists' Publishing Company Ltd.
Caxton House
63-65 High Street
Tenterden
Kent TN30 6BD
United Kingdom

Monday 14^th October

 

                                                     

Dear Dr Bulgin

                                                                              It seems that very few subjects (excepting religion and politics) is as divisive, socially dangerous and confusing in its beliefs. I am personally a traditionalist with a love of fine art, rather than modern or interpretive. I was recently in an art group on facebook , an idea that I thought was a wonderful method for exchanging views and ideas. We even had subject days, such as ‘words, ‘ colours’ etc. It did the job wonderfully for about three weeks and then exploded. I made a remark on my not being a fan of modern art and was immediately attacked as being arrogant and in making generalisations. First of all it is true, I am not a fan, but I know of no prescriptive authority that I must like it. A generalisation? Perhaps, but as I have seen nothing I like, it is a truth. On the other hand I can spend ages looking at a painting in a gallery, by the likes of John Martin.  So that party was brought to an end when I was asked to leave or stop being aggressive (For aggressive please read; I failed to agree or be bullied by them).

 

Students are not being trained to paint or draw but to express themselves.  I  think employers are interested in results rather than the angst of the artist....

 

I read your magazine regularly and am bemused by a current ongoing dispute over ‘non-professionals’ being the only ones allowed to sell their work. I’m a freelance journalist, though I did not study journalism. Selling your story depends on individual talent, timing, finding the right place and a reasonable smattering of luck, but there is no black market. Surely professional s still means carrying out work for money. So if someone sells a piece they are, at least temporarily professional. What do the professionals have to fear? If they are so much better then they are more likely to sell their material  anyway? The system to me (as a novice) comes over to me as a draconian form of trade unionism.

Yours sincerely

Anthony Joisce

Cheesey Thief

A Story of a Mousey Villain

 

            Bert Holliday was born in London’s East End in 1891. His upbringing seems to have been unremarkable. He was just an ordinary child of the time, from a lowly background. This was to change as he aged however. He eventually became known as the “Gentleman Cracksman”, and “Johnny the Gent”. Where the name “Johnny” came from is not clear. His nicknames did reflect his character however.  From his humble beginnings, Holliday was to become one of the most successful jewel thieves in the country.

During the late nineteenth and early twentieth century, detective and mystery fiction was dominated by Mr Sherlock Holmes. One author (E.W. Hornung), who happened to be related to Conan Doyle through marriage, took the famous detective and turned him firmly on his head. The resulting character was one A.J. Raffles, the gentleman thief; eternal houseguest and rubber of high-class shoulders. He mixed effortlessly with the upper echelons, and could banter with the best of them. The first of Raffles’ adventures, "The Ides of March", appeared in the June 1898 edition of Cassell’s Magazine, and went on to be not quite as popular as Holmes, but did come in an admirable second place.

            One can't help but wonder if Holliday modelled himself upon the fictional gentleman thief. With his success, came all the trappings of an upper-class lifestyle. He lived in a house named “Jour de Fete”, on the river Thames. Obviously an educated man, with an eye for humour and wit, or some may say pretentions and vanity; Bert had named his house after himself. “Jour de Fete” translates from French as “holiday”. He also liked to mix in high-class company, and would frequently ride with the hunt. His other passion in life was fishing; a pastime that he indulged in as frequently as his busy schedule would allow. It gave him some time to himself, in peaceful surroundings, and a break from the adrenaline rush of his larceny.

            He did occasionally use an accomplice in his escapades. “Poofy” Len Oades would accompany Holliday on some of his forays. Generally, though he preferred to work alone, and was not afraid to prepare himself for violence. It is rumoured that he carried a gun with him at all times.

            Bert Holliday was such a successful and notorious, not to mention widely travelled, thief, that he was sort after be five police forces from five different counties. They were very keen to prosecute Holliday, but he successfully evaded them for several years. His undoing was to be somewhat absurd and an anticlimax to the high-living, gentleman thief.

            It was the theft of a cheese from The Dumbell Inn in Taplow, Buckinghamshire in 1949, that was to prove his undoing. Why he stole a cheese, when he could so easily have bought one, has gone to the grave with him. Perhaps it was because he was so used to taking whatever he wanted, without paying, or could it have been his keen eye for wit and humour? To “cheese it” was slang, in the world of thieves, for “scarpering”, or “making oneself scarce”. Unfortunately for Bert, on this occasion he did not “scarper” quickly enough, and was captured by the police.

 

            They had caught up with him at last, and were not about to let him go easily. His bail was set at the huge sum of £2000. It is a testament to his prior successes and his wealth, that Holliday was able to afford the payment of his bail. When he was released, he promptly disappeared, and his whereabouts were to be unknown for four years. He eventually headed for Virginia Water, a large man-made lake in Surrey, which occupies the south-eastern corner of Windsor Great Park. In a hotel by the lake in 1953, Bert Holliday used a gun, disguised as a walking stick to shoot himself. The farewell note was short and un-dramatic; merely bemoaning the fact that he would be unable to go fishing that day.

Windcuffer

The kestrel is a very important bird to me. I wrote an article on it and sent
it to a local magazine from which I got the reply that they had enough bird material, but they may be interested in the hedgehog article, so I sent it in, I have now been writing for ages. See the dedication below:

I've also included that article, and you'll find out what windcuffer means,,,

“Windhover” – A Natural Treasure

By Anthony Joisce

 

            The “windhover” (European Kestrel) is the most frequently seen bird of prey in Britain. Whether on a Sunday afternoon stroll or perhaps more likely, from the comfort of your car on the A1, the kestrel is impossible to miss. Hovering, head into the wind, with rapid wing-beats and a twitch of tail feathers, the bird maintains its position with consummate grace and expertise. The sight of a kestrel can add a moment’s wonder to an otherwise uneventful journey. 

If you are lucky enough to get a close look you will find a surprisingly colourful bird with a beautiful tawny orange back, spotted with black. The male differs from the female in that he is smaller and has a grey-blue head and tail. The female is usually a more dull chestnut orange, though sometimes she may also have a blue-grey cast to the head that makes her difficult to differentiate from the male. Juvenile birds are coloured the same as the female, regardless of sex, until the end of the first year when a male will develop the blue tail. It will be another year before he gains the blue-grey head. Standing 33cm to 36cm tall and having a wingspan of between 70cm and 80cm makes them small when compared to other raptors. The wings are noticeably pointed at the tips allowing fast, manoeuvrable flight and rapid stoops, a characteristic which tells us that it is a member of the falcon family, hence the scientific name: Falco Tinnunculus. This method of naming species using two words, derived from Latin or Greek, was developed by Carl Linnaeus, to allow identification across international language barriers.

            Falco is most likely derived from Latin falcatus, meaning “sickle-shaped”. This refers to the shape of the wings; curving to a point at the tip. The word tinnunculus was first used by Pliny the Elder (a first century Roman scholar) to describe a small bird of prey; probably the kestrel.

Pliny probably used tinnunculus as a description connected with the verb tinnio: to have a sharp or shrill voice, to cry, scream or sing. Also the adjective tinnulus: ringing, tinkling, shrill sounding. These clearly refer to the common call of the kestrel which is a harsh staccato “kee-kee-kee”. You are most likely to hear them chattering over the Northumbrian countryside during the mating season: April to May

The name kestrel is a variation of castrell, recorded in the seventeenth century. This was borrowed from Middle French cresselle,  meaning rattle. Even today the Roman Catholic Church uses a small wooden rattle called a cresselle, in place of a bell.

            Given the shrill nature of the kestrel’s call, this seems a little odd, as rattles tend not to be high pitched. The texture of the sound though, with its staccato rhythm could, with a little imagination be compared with a rattle.

            The call is not the most identifiable characteristic of the bird. It is the hovering silhouette that catches your attention first; usually over roadside verges. This is because a lot of time is spent on the road, so we are more likely to be there to see them. The verges, with their long grass, relatively wild mixture of plants and discarded food items create a fine ecosystem for small mammals. The favourite food of the kestrel is the field vole. These small creatures are unlikely to be seen by people, unless the family cat presents one to the household. As they scurry about they leave a trail of urine which is visible to the kestrel in the ultra-violet spectrum; so the bird can follow a trail to the unfortunate mammal. Hovering above, unlike other falcons, the kestrel will not commit itself to one high speed stoop, but rather stoops to a lower altitude, before stooping again and possibly even a third time, before falling on its prey.

            This habit of hovering is illustrated by the colloquial names that have been given to the kestrel over the years, such as that of “windhover”. However, there are many other colourful names such as “hover hawk”; “stand hawk”; “wind cuffer”; “wind bivver”; “wind bibber” and “wind sucker” that  may be found throughout the country. There is an old and more unexpected name that alludes to this same behaviour. The work of William Lockwood unearthed that in the sixteenth century it was known as the “wind f***er” and that until the nineteenth century, in northern England, the name “f***wind” survived. The modern translation of these names is “wind beater”, but it is unlikely that there will be a resurgence of these old names (particularly in family discussions).

            Although hovering is the most commonly seen hunting behaviour, the kestrel spends relatively little time in the air, preferring the “perch and pounce” technique. Sitting on a post or tree branch, waiting for a likely target, it will then stoop down to capture it. While the vole is the favourite prey, worms, insects, mice, and even small birds (particularly in urban environments) also form part of the diet.

Kestrels have adapted to live very well with humans and can take advantage of a number of surroundings. The preference is for open land such as meadow and farmland (trees, hedges and fences being beneficial), they may also be found in heaths, marshes, cliffs and coastal areas; all habitats with which Northumberland is blessed.

            This ability to adapt has undoubtedly been a major factor in the survival of the kestrel. As other birds of prey, they have suffered great challenges from the activities of people; including persecution, and the use of pesticide, particularly the now well known DDT, both having taken their toll on numbers. However following the ban on DDT and the education of  land-owners, numbers began to increase and were estimated at 70,000 pairs in the 1990s. But continued intensive farming methods and a crash in the numbers of voles has reduced this number to about 40,000; placing the kestrel on the amber list for conservation. Hopefully the fall in small mammal numbers is a short term part of the cycle of the animal population and will recover itself, and the increase in more environmentally friendly farming will give the kestrel a better chance.

            The adaptability to hunting grounds also extends to nesting choices. Kestrels are not nest builders – they take an opportunity where they find it. This may be an old crow’s nest, a hole in a tree, a crevice in a wall or cliff, or even on building ledges in town centres. The three to six eggs are laid in April or May, with incubation taking about a month. The chicks need constant brooding for the first ten to fourteen days and usually fledge when they are about a month old. They are year-round inhabitants, but will change location depending on food supplies.

            Some chicks are illegally taken from the wild each year by unscrupulous would-be falconers. They may try to fly them, but more often the birds are abandoned and left to die. Kestrels have not been traditionally valued as falconry birds; possibly because of their diminutive stature and the size of prey they take. This is illustrated by the following passage from the “The Boke of St Albans” (1486):

 

“An Eagle for an Emperor, a Gyrfalcon for a King, a Peregrine for a Prince, a Saker for a Knight, a Merlin for a Lady, a Goshawk for a Yeoman, a Sparrowhawk for a Priest, a Musket for a Holy water Clerk, a Kestrel for a Knave.”

           

This passage provided the title for the novel by Barry Hines: “A Kestrel for a Knave” (1968), which was later to be adapted to the film “Kes”, directed by Ken Loach (1969). Unfortunately the attitude that a kestrel is a lowly bird seems to have led to the belief that it is a good choice for a novice falconer and an easy bird to keep. Nothing could be further from the truth:  take for example the maintenance of body weight. If a bird is allowed to get too heavy it will refuse to fly, if too light it will die. Smaller birds have more critical allowances than their larger counterparts. A kestrel with an established flying weight of five ounces only has to lose half an ounce and it will die. Equally, if allowed to gain half an ounce it will not fly.

            A kestrel may have been considered a lowly bird, but its abilities cannot help but evoke wonder in the spectator. It is perfectly suited and adapted to its chosen niche and it has survived through the challenges it has faced. As a high level predator it is the first to suffer when an ecosystem fails, so the sight of the “windhover” is a sign that the local ecosystem is in fine form. Northumberland has such a diverse range of habitats that it is an ideal county to be the home of this natural treasure, and the regular sightings at places such as those illustrated in the photographs is a credit to the environment of the county.

Mini planets

Well I thought mini planets would work well with some of my favourite pictures, but judge for yourself...

 

I think it's sort of attrative, but you wouldn't believe the hassle I went throug to get it.

 



The Queen

Do you think the queen would walk down this red carpet ? 

A bit creepy

I apologise in advance if you are a fan of Isabella and the pot of basil. If you just enjoy the painting as it is please stop reading. If you want to know the sinister aspect then stay with me. 

Isabella, or the Pot of Basil (1818) is a narrative poem by John Keats adapted from a story in Boccaccio's Decameron (IV, 5). It tells the tale of a young woman whose family intend to marry her to "some high noble and his olive trees", but who falls for Lorenzo, one of her brothers' employees. When the brothers learn of this they murder Lorenzo and bury his body. His ghost informs Isabella in a dream. She exhumes the body and buries the head in a pot of basil which she tends obsessively, while pining away.

Creepy? Poignant? Touching?

Wonga!

How much would you pay for this? Thousands, tens of thousands, hundreds of thousands, millions? It doesn't matter really because it probably isn't for sale.

I was reading a new book yesterday and it pointed out something that should be obvious. Paintings, whatever the era were created to be sold. In the Industrial revolution there was a lot of money floating about for luxuries, like paintings. 

Then came environmentalism as explorers returned with examples of rare species. I'm not cynical but guess what started to sell and that we have many of from the era? Yep landscapes and animals. We can stick as many meanings as we like on art but it is still a commodity and at least they are honest about it. Are we having our money sucked out of us by modern art because that is what is trendy rather than it having a meaning? Or am I devil's advocate?

Too lazy

I'm too tired to sleep and feeling a little artistic, yet devil may care. I'm not going to splutter about light sources in the work of Vermeer. I thought I'd post some pictures. 

I don't bloody know!

I've just made an ultramarine wash with the intention of creating a surreal space scene, but I don't feel very surreal now! I suppose I could put in some tropica fish, but I can't draw reefs, any suggestions would be gratefully received. Here's my really interesting wash;

The colour isn't bad but..

I thought the art itself would be the most difficult, but I'm beginning to wonder whether finding something suitable to draw is more difficult!

Painting

Well that's the first painting finished and sent to Artist magazine because I think it will highlight the performance of the theory I suggestedm using computers in mixed media art. The weather has made me think of other things, like the countryside management course I did. So a note of caution:

Don't use a chainsaw without training or you might rip your face of. There's a specific danger called .kickback. If the chain tip hits something it throws the saw backwards into your face. I'll not be descriptive about the injuries,

Those who work with dangeous machinery check it for yourself, even if the person before you was meant to service it. I borrowed a chainsaw and climbing rope. I was told the saw had just been seviced, well it must have been a basket head that did it. They didn't tighten the side bolts and I failed to check them. They came our and bar flew through the woods, whilem fortunately the chain embeded itself in the tree. The rope was also not serviced correctly. It was a new rope, but it hadn't been soaked, so about 30ft up it lost grip and I fell fifteen feet with my back over a branch. I was okay- I was lucky!

I've seen all manner of stupidity. If you have to have a chainsaw and can't go on a course, ok ok please at least read the manual and get the gear!

I was going somewhere with this story. Oh yeah a council worker was sitting on a branch sawing. He was sawing the branch he was sitting on and ended up clattering to the ground. He sued the council on the grounds that he'd never been trained and he won.!!!

Strange day

It always takes me a good while to get used to this darkness in the winter, always finding it s little strange. This little picture represents my day

There are all kinds of images in there to keep you entertained. Maybe I'll stick my ugly mug through the software as that would be marginally less scary than my real picturee

Is stupidity a bad thing?

Some would say not. Stupidity is not only bonding, it's also essential to progress. Stupid people are, by definition, those with less sense and ability to reason. But their irrationality and illogicality may be the very qualities that make them more imaginative and creative. The ability to look at the world differently, to think outside the box, is crucial to innovation. Even brainboxes acknowledge this. Albert Einstein said: 'I never came upon any of my discoveries through the process of rational thinking.' And another egghead, Ludwig Wittgenstein, observed: 'If people did not sometimes do silly things, nothing intelligent would ever get done.' The kind of stupidity celebrated in this collection is
Jarski, Rosemarie (2008-12-05). Dim Wit: The Funniest, Stupidest Things Ever Said (Kindle Locations 291-296). Ebury Publishing. Kindle Edition.

Avascular necrosis

It started with a feeling of tendonitis, but got worse until I could barely walk. So off to the physiotherapist and he sent me for an x-ray and I have avascular necrosis. This is basically a shortage of blood to the bone, so the bone dies. The first thing they tried was to drill into the bone to see if the bloodflow would start again. No such luck - had to have a hip replacement. The pain is indescribable long after and I am still walking with a stick, but I like to say I'm the right side of being ill. Just got to build the body up. Starting to do more for myself again and started teaching myself to paint. It''s very relaxing as is learning about art and going to art galleries. You can get some good apps and kindle material on artists at reasonable prices. It was Escher that got me interested and there are some great surrealists out there. Have a look for a book called Illusion and one called Masters of deception. Why lot leave a comment about anything I've had to say?

Pleasant visit

Was doing a bit of painting and my dad mentioned the idea of going for a visit. It was ages since we'd been to Cragside country house so off we went. I was feeling a bit nervous because I wasn't sure how my leg would hold up' I'll tell you about that soon. The disabled bays were a good way away from the house but they had a cool little bus service. When you go in it strikes you just how rich these people were. But Lord Armstrong was an engineering genius. A river runs through the grounds and he used it to power everything from electric lights to rotisserie. The kitchen is huge and there are more rooms than anyone coupled hope to use. There is also, as you will expect some beautiful art works. Ill come back with some photos when I sort out the camera...

White Pen

I've seen this little beast mentioned many times and have wondered as to its fame. Then I happened upon a blue sky printed using a computer and I could not get anything to draw on it with, until I used my white pen. It took a few coats but gave a wonderful 3d cloud that looks like oil painting. Now I'm a fan and am after some other colours 

Opposite direction

Now pointing the other way

Live

Reporting live from the Laing! It's busy in here today and there are some dreadfully loud and bad mannered individual. I really don't want to know their business. Oh bigger I've left my walking stick downstairs. Anyway it's relaxing sitting here and this is my immediate vision

At last!

Finally got into the Laing. Was it worth it? Absolutely. It's an 18 and 19th Century exhibition. They have 6 John Martin's out. I've been a fan for ages but to be in the presence of greatness was mindblowing. Also have works by Hedley, Gainsborough and numerous others like Isabella with a basil pot. I'll let you find out the story. These works make your blood pump and the hair on the back of your neck stand up. I have included some copies but they can't do the originals justice. 

Cheer myself up

As the gallery was closed I headed for the bookshop to see what I could see. They had a monster of a book called Art : the definitive guide. At £30 it was a monster of a price as well. It is the most fascinating book on art I have ever seem and it is beautifully illustrated,

Oh dear

I'm afraid I must hang my head in shame. It seems that the gallery is closed on Mondays. Mind you that isn't what they put on their website, so I don't think I'll take total responsibility.

They are advertising a talk on Isabella with a Pot of Basil. This isn't usually my sort of thing but I'm very taken with the painting.

Worst swear word

Think of the worst swear word you use and apply it to inaccurate websites. Got to the town, parked and ready to go: straight towards darkness and locked doors! The Laing was closed. 

They might be inaccurate but not deliberately misleading. Got a video last night that was supposed to be a story of warring parents that deteriorated into total chaos and violence. Get that swear word ready-they didn't even say that. Gave up and started watching Goon

Laing art gallery

Brilliant. The Laing art gallery is open with a new exhibition!!! They are supposed to have The Destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah. If you don't know of John Martin I recommend you look at his work. It is believed that he influenced how Hollywood films are made. Can't wait to go. I'll come back and babble on about it!

Stupidity

I promised stupidity so here we go...Living on a farm is a great adventure on your off-road bike. The trouble is adventure is facing the unknown.

I was riding gently through long grass on a field I'd not been to. It looked level. The first I knew otherwise the front wheel had dropped into a 3 foot ditch and I flew over the handlebars. Would you believe I didn't break my glasses but I did get whiplash and concussion. Then we.had to use the quad to pull the bike out. What a palaver!

America

Watched. Film called God Bless America. A man is sick of all the petty Jarred's in the world and decides to clean up. With a psychopathic teenager by his side he goes on a spree killing the selfish, rude and downright nasty. I'll not spoil it for you but it is worth a watch and most can probably relate to Frank.

Another pet hate

This is a brief one; cruelty to animals. There is no excuse. If you're training use treats not punishment. You'll be grateful later when that little animal comes up to you instead. Of cowering at your approach. Here's a picture of our dog, Becky

I'm proud to say she loves everyone and is so gentle.

This morning

God I wish I could sleep. Watched the most annoying film I've ever seen last night. It was basically about suicide bombers and was expectedly violent, which takes me on to one of my pet hates: arrogance. Between it and religion it has killed more people than is imaginable.

Wallington

Just had a trip to Wallington Hall. It really is a beautiful place. Given modern entry costs if you're near some sites you want to visit more than once it's worth joining. 

The National Trust has a new attitude to photos in a lot of places. Previously you weren't allowed to take photos, but now you can as long as the flash is off, but be prepared for people to wander through your shot, because I swear they don't even know where they are, let alone you!

Some more

Matisse was accused of doing things any child could do, and he answered very cheerfully, ‘Yes, but not what you could do.’ Allan Kaprow

Jarski, Rosemarie (2010-09-02). Funniest Thing You Never Said 2 (p. 364). Ebury Publishing. Kindle Edition.

Sculpture is the art of the hole and the lump. Auguste Rodin

 We sculptors are generally less nervy than painters because we get a chance to hammer out our neuroses. Henry Moore

He didn’t like heads, did he? John Prescott, opening an exhibition of Henry Moore’s sculptures
To be a sculptor you need to be one part artist and nine parts navvy. John Skeaping

For Alberto Giacometti, to sculpt is to take the fat off space. Jean-Paul Sartre

I saw the angel in the marble and carved until I set him free. Michelangelo Buonarroti

Jarski, Rosemarie (2010-09-02). Funniest Thing You Never Said 2 (p. 366). Ebury Publishing. Kindle Edition.

This made me smile

I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade... And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party.

Ron White

I don't even like vodka. I used to like Tequila, but I gave myself alcohol poisoning and was off school for a week!

Heating

Well, at least least last night I got some sleep but not  enough, it still resulted in the overconsumption of biscuits! We used to have a shop that sold gifty type things, but it went bottoms up. It had no gas so it had a lovelt flame effect electric heater, with a remote control! It's a shame but it had to go somewhere and I had my eye on that heater from the moment we knew we were closing because in my bedroom if you have a glass of water on your sidestand you can bet it'll be frozen by morning. Now there it is in pride of place and I'm not going to freeze my wotsits off!

Cottages

I've been on for ages with my cottage picture, only to find that it looks far too small compared to everything, but not small enough to pretend it's a gnome house. I'm going to use multi media (cheat) by scanning in the picture, removing the house and putting a lovely little cottage in that I can find somewhere on the internet. It isn't really cheatin because art is digital now anyway isn't it and it seems such a shame to dump it...

Awake

That was a weird night. If you read my previous post you'll know why. Well things have improved with the sunshine, but the attempt I made with my painting is going to take some fixing. 

I have spoken about visual art, but what about written. My favourite books are Three Men in a Boat and Zen Art for Meditation. I have first editions of each,an 1884 of boat andother copies of.each in czse something happens to one of them. I also have a copy of Boat on my Kindle. It sounds zodd I know but they usually make me feel jolly. You should polick up some copies...

Vermeer

Lying here unable to sleep as usual. I have depression you se and sometimes it makes things move that really ought to be still and sometimes there are things that aren't there at all. Have you ever had the feeling there's someone under the bed? Could you sleep? No? My mind turns to two paintings by Vermeer (painted the Girl in the Pearl Earring). I'm thinking of the Geographer and the Astronomer. They remind me of the Iron Maiden album Seventh Son of a Seventh Son. Or maybe it's just my state of mind. I'm sure it'll be different at dawn,,,